"I don't want to see any Jackie Chan bollocks...."

I come to you with empty hands. I have no weapons; but should I be forced to defend myself, my principles, or my honor; should it be a matter of life or death, of right or wrong, then here are my weapons – my empty hands.

Indeed.

Here is quite possibly my favourite internet video of all time.  Paul Kaye at his absolute best.  Enjoy.